Au Contraire! Figuring Out The French…

I get the greatest letters from you readers. Today I woke up to this one:

“I must respond to this email or I will not sleep for days!! I’ve lived/worked in Paris and throughout France for the past 12 years and nothing could be farther from the truth!!! I’m sorry to admit I was accosted…approached and “picked up on” if I even met the eye of a person of the opposite sex, in Paris especially…(south of France, too…especially Nice and Monaco). I had a man, whom I asked directions from in Paris, follow me for a day…even finding out my hotel info and when I changed hotels to avoid him, he managed to find me! I hate to see you giving women (especially American women innocent of foreign ways) this kind of advice! Remember where you originated and how it really is…It’s important for safety and sanctity. Sincerely, A faithful Reader”

Well, ‘A Faithful Reader,’ you must be very beautiful. I certainly can’t say I’ve had the same experience. We should all be so lucky! So, I suppose ‘A Faithful Reader’ would rather be ignored by men? According to Ruth Mastron and Gilles Asselin, authors of “Au Contraire! Figuring Out the French,” —

“French women in the United States often complain of feeling ignored by American men, who neither look at them appreciatively nor display the ‘galanterie’ of French men. American women are confused by this attitude. For them, calling attention to women’s sexuality in a nonsexual relationship or setting is by definition an affront because it reduces women to the status of objects. And, when in France, they are appalled by precisely those behaviors that seem to charm French women.”

Don’t you just love it?…A cultural clash if I’ve ever seen one. The authors open with a basis for our misunderstandings: “French cultural values, behaviors and attitudes differ markedly from those in the United States. Perhaps what makes this discover startling is that we look a lot alike.” They describe culture as an”iceberg” — only 10% above the waterline is visible, the other 90% remains hidden. The visible part is all the things that make a visit to a foreign culture interesting. The invisible part becomes apparent only after an extended period of living or working there.

Often I joke with friends about having “crossed over” to the other side…meaning that I see things now from a more French point of view. They have an expression for this: “Plus Français que le roi!” — More French than the king! That clearly comes from all the years of breaking away the tip of the iceberg to discover what really lies beyond the visible signs of the culture.

I see culture clashes happen on almost a daily basis, and not just with casual visitors, but with foreign residents, too, just like ‘A Faithful Reader.’ It’s the most difficult part of creating a new life here…the single biggest challenge. All the others are merely physical hurdles — getting residency status, learning French, renting or purchasing an apartment, sending your kids to school, etc., etc. All of these can be easily surmounted, but crossing the cultural divide?

Well, be prepared to hear yourself saying things like: “I find it hard to believe that…” and then stop and become a believer, because at that moment you’ve just chipped away a bit of the iceberg.

SPECIAL NOTES:

Ruth Matron is joining us in Washington, DC to speak about “Crossing the Cultural Divide” at the Living and Investing in France Conference September 10 -12 (there are still a few places left). She will also back me up on Thursday evening September 9th at Brasserie Les Halles…I’ll be talking about “Being Single in the City of Light (And Loving It!)” and Ruth will make a special appearance talk about “Life with a French Man!” It’s sure to be hilarious and loads of fun! To learn more or reserve your place, visit /frenchproperty/conference/LIF_DC/LIF_DC_single.html

“Au Contraire! Figuring Out the French” was written by Gilles Asselin and Ruth Mastron, published by Intercultural Press, Inc. and is available for purchase by visiting http://www.sococo.com/aucontraire.html

A la prochaine…

 

Adrian Leeds
Editor, Parler Paris
E-mail: [email protected]

P.S. I’ve got a couple of last-minute apartment rental reductions you shouldn’t pass up:

* Available August 29 – September 10, the “Medieval Suite” has been reduced from 120 euros/night to 80!
* Available September 10 – 18 the “Normandy Suite” has been reduced from 120 euros/night to 80!
* Available August 20 – 29 the “Monte Carlo Seaside” has been reduced from 800 euros/ week to 500!
* And my own apartment (Leeds Marais), available September 4 – 14, has been reduced from 140 euros/night to 100!

See /parlerparis/apartments for more details on each of these apartments and all the other luxury vacation rentals we offer or write me at [email protected]

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Further resources:
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Can’t get enough to read about Paris and France? These are our favorite books by our favorite authors.

* Dream of working and living in France? Don’t know how to go about simply DOING IT? Rose Marie Burke tells you how!

* Though France might seem as familiar as any other Western country, the truth is, from paying taxes to having a baby — things are done differently in France. Read the stories how other people maneuvered the system.

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If you wish your community announcement to be listed in the Parler Paris Previews, please provide the text in ENGLISH just as you’d like it to appear and send it to [email protected] We reserve the right to edit as necessary.

Thank you, Adrian

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Strictly Entertainment: Comedy, Plays, Movies
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GREG’S PROOPS
Thursday, August 19th, 8:30 p.m.
Hôtel du Nord
102 quai de Jemmapes
Paris 10th
Tickets only available on the night, payment in cash: 20 euros (17 euros for students/old age pensioners/SLM card holders)
Please book by email or phone 01 53 19 98 88 as soon as possible because it already looks like this is a sold out show!

COMEDY IN SEPTEMBER
Jimeoin September 6 and 7
Phil kay September 19, 20 and 21
Tickets on the night 20 euros, advance payment 17 euros
send checks to Beer Necessities (tickets)
104 quai de Jemmapes
Paris 75010 + stamped adressed envelope at least ten days before date of show.

Book all shows by calling 01.53.19.98.88 or by email
[email protected] or http://www.anythingmatters.com

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MOVING PARTS PLAY READINGS IN ENGLISH

Carr’s Pub & Restaurant
1 rue du Mont Thabor, 75001 Paris
Métro: Tuileries
Sundays 7:30 p.m.

12th September Barratt Walton “Buddha’s Aunt”
3rd October Lance Tait (tba)
7th November Linda Healey “Masks”
21st November Jon Allen Russo “Farce Noir”
5th December Shena Wilson (tba)

To receive the monthly mailings email [email protected]
For further information contact: http://www.scamparis.com or call Stephanie Campion on: 06.14.67.18.58

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Musical Interludes
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CONCERTS AT LES 7 LÉZARDS
7 p.m. and 10 p.m. Concerts
For all details and more information, visit
http://www.7lezards.com/welcome.htm

SUNDAYS AT THE 7 LÉZARDS!
With the Dominique Fitte-Duval Quartet
Free Entry

ALL OTHER SHOWS:

Friday 20 August
NAT JONES QUARTET

Saturday 21 August
NAT JONES QUARTET

Wednesday 25 August
JOBIC LE MASSON

Jeudi 26 August
YASMINE

Friday 27 August
STEFAN VASNIER trio

Friday 27 August
MAJOR MINOR
Joan Minor sings

Saturday 28 August
FREDERIC LOISEAU trio

Sunday 29 August
HILDEGARDE VANSLAWE

Mardi 31 August
NICOLA SABATO trio

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Paul Kelly
Sunday, August 29th, 8 p.m.
Tickets on night 25 euros in advance 22 euros…
http://www.paulkelly.com.au
Hôtel Du Nord
102 quai de Jemmapes
Paris 10th

Chris Whitley
Monday, August 30th, 8:30 p.m.
Tickets on night 22 euros advance payment 20 euros
La Java
105 faubourg du Temple
Paris 10th

Jack Tempchin
A peaceful easy evening at The Sound Gallery
104 quai de Jemmapes
Paris 10th
Friday, September 24th, 8:30 p.m.
Email Karel Beer for more information: [email protected]

Jesse Malin
Tuesday, October 6th, 8:30 p.m.
Tickets on night 22 euros advance payment 20 euros
La Java
105 faubourg du Temple
Paris 10th

Reservations for all concerts 01.53.19.98.88 FNAC/VIRGIN etc.
Book all shows by calling 01.53.19.98.88 or by email
[email protected] or http://www.anythingmatters.com

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CONCERTS ON THE GREEN NOW THROUGH SEPTEMBER

Enjoy free concerts of all types of music in the open air in lots of Paris’ greenest spots! Visit http://www.paris.fr/fr/environnement/jardins/animations_jardins/concerts_jardins/default.asp for more information

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Bonnes Soirées and Great Gatherings
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Parler Paris Après-Midi
/parlerparis/apresmidi.html

NEXT MEETING: No Après Midi Meeting in August. September 14th, 2004 AND EVERY SECOND TUESDAY OF THE MONTH 3 p.m. to 5 p.m.

This is your opportunity to meet every month, often with local
professionals who can answer your Working and Living in France
questions. You are invited to come for drinks and share your questions
and comments about what it takes to create a life here, own property
and enjoy what France has to offer. It is also an opportunity to
network with other Parler Paris readers.

Upstairs at La Pierre du Marais
96, rue des Archives at the corner of rue de Bretagne, 75003 Paris
Métro Lines 9, 3 et 11, stations Temple, République or Arts et Métiers

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PARIS SOIRÉE DINNERS EVERY SUNDAY

Patricia Laplante-Collins has international dinner parties on the Ile St-Louis. She hosts a 21st Century Paris Salon where you meet interesting people in Paris and have a lot of fun. There is always a Guest speaker, perhaps a Writer, Actor, Historian — you name it, Patricia hosts them all. For reservations or to be on the mailing list: call 01 43 26 12 88 or write [email protected]

Please mark your calendar for the next Paris Soirées Dinner:
Sunday, August 22 at 7:30 p.m.

JUST MARILYN: An Alluring And Affectionate Tribute To Cultural Icon Marilyn Monroe Featuring Vocalist Kate Michaels. Kate, In Town For A Concert Will Discuss Her Marilyn Monroe Pro

ject and CD.

(Kate Michaels and the Red Threads will perform from the Marilyn Monroe Songbook at The Petite Journal in Montparnasse August 31st, 13 rue du Commandant-Mouchotte, 75014 Paris, m° Montparnasse. For reservations: 01 43 21 56 70 – Dinner and Show or Show Only)

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Knowledge is Power — Conferences, Workshops and Seminars
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Paint or Draw Portraits and Self Portraits with American Portrait
Artist Kathy Burke in her beautiful Marais atelier…

245 Euros 3-hour private session
490 Euros 3-hour session with 2 to 6 people
Includes all materials.

For more information, [email protected]

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LIVING AND INVESTING IN FRANCE CONFERENCE

If you’ve always dreamed of moving to France, starting a new life in Paris, enjoying a “pied-à-terre” of your own part of the year or investing in property in France, these power-packed conferences are a MUST. Hosted by the International Living Paris Office and Adrian Leeds, Editorial Director and Editor of the Parler Paris daily newsletter, these few days will arm you with all the information you need to make it happen! The line-up for the conferences include seminars, discussions, dinners, cocktails — with well-known Paris, Europe and U.S.-based experts.

*** Living and Investing in France
Washington, DC September 10 – 12, 2004
For more information:
/frenchproperty/conference/LIF_DC/LIF_DC_home.html

Plus…
Dinner and Virtual Tour of Paris with Thirza
/frenchproperty/conference/LIF_DC/LIF_DC_dinner_tour.html

Plus…
Walking Tour of French-Speaking DC
/frenchproperty/conference/LIF_DC/LIF_DC_walking_tour.html

Plus…
Single in the City of Light
(And Loving It!) with Adrian Leeds
/frenchproperty/conference/LIF_DC/LIF_DC_single.html

*** Read what our past participants have to say about our Conferences and Tours…
/frenchproperty/conference/conferencements.html

Reservations and information:

If you’d like to know more about the conferences or reserve your place, visit /frenchproperty/conference/index.html or
email Schuyler Hoffman:

U.S. OFFICE
Schuyler Hoffman, Special Conference Coordinator
Toll Free in the U.S. 1-877-457-2747
Email: [email protected]

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Learning la Langue Française
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Parler Parlor French-English Conversation Group
http://www.parlerparlor.com

Celebrating our 7th Year in Paris

NEXT SPECIAL EVENT

La Rentrée Saturday, September 18, 2004, 11 a.m.
Come for Conversation Then Have Lunch with Us!

Quiche Feast (Quiche, Salad, Dessert, Wine and Soft Drinks)
7 Euro per Person

Eurocentres, 13, passage Dauphine, 6th

Plus, Sign-Up That Day and Save! —
Take 10 Euro Off a 10-Session Card and 20 Euro Off a 20-Session Card!

Join us at the Parler Parlor conversation group in Paris France for free-form conversation with native French and English speakers. Practice speaking 45 minutes in French, 45 minutes in English. Make friends, discuss interesting topics, learn about other cultures, progress in understanding and speaking, naturally and easily, in
groups of six to eight, each in its own acoustically sound private room.

PARLOR TIMES — 3 TIMES A WEEK IN TWO LOCATIONS

Tuesdays 6:30 to 8 p.m.

BERLITZ OPERA
38 Avenue de l’Opéra
2nd arrondissement, Paris
Opéra, RER A Auber

Wednesdays 2:30 p.m. to 4 p.m. and Saturdays 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.

AT EUROCENTRES
13 passage Dauphine (entrance between rue Dauphine and rue Mazarine),
6th arrondissement
Métro Odéon, Saint-Michel

MEMBERSHIP AND GENERAL INFORMATION
http://www.parlerparlor.com
Email: [email protected]
Elisabeth Crochard, Tel: 01 44 19 76 61
Adrian Leeds, Tel: 01 40 27 97 59

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The Sporting Life
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Till August 29t, 22 of the 27 public swimming pools are open. Consult
http://www.paris.fr/fr/sport/actualites/piscines_ete2004.asp for more information.

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New! Reserve your public tennis court by Internet!
Visit http://www.paris.fr/fr/sport/tennis/default.asp for more information.

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What’s On in The City of Light
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Paris Plage
LAST WEEKEND!
July 21 – August 20, 2004
http://www.paris.fr/fr/actualites/ete_paris_2004/Paris_plage_2004/default.asp

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Sous la Plage
June 20 – September 19, 2004
Four Sundays and so concerts on the lawns of the Parc André-Citroën
http://www.soulaplage.com

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Cinéma en Plein Air à la Villette
July 16 – August 29, 2004
14th edition of free films in the open air on the big inflatable screen at Parc de la Villette
http://www.villette.com

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Cinéma au Clair de Lune
August 4 – 26, 2004
Free films in the open air set in appropriate spots in Paris
http://www.forumdesimages.net

Favorite Pick of the Week:
Thursday, August 26th, 9:30 p.m.
American Film: Is Paris Burning?
with Alain Delon, Kirk Douglas, Simon Signoret, Eves Montand, Antony Perkins

Parvis de l’Hôtel de Ville, M° Hôtel de Ville

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“3 JOURS / 3 EUROS”

Three days, three euros. August 22, 23 and 24 the City of Paris in collaboration with the Fédération Nationale des Cinémas Français invites you to 378 cinemas in the capital to see movies of your choice for only 3 euros!
http://www.paris.fr/fr/culture/actualites/Cinema_clair_lune/default.asp

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Special Announcements
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Because traffic is so greatly reduced the month of August, more than 80% of the parking places in Paris will be free of charge! To consult the list, visit
http://www.paris.fr/fr/Deplacements/Stationnement/ete2004/

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FIRST ANNUAL WICE BOOK FAIR BENEFIT
In conjunctio

n with Studio Arts Open House

Do you have books to donate? Contribute your books to the Fair and we will pick them up!
Please contact John Baxter at 01.43.54.25.74

Biggest English-Language Weekend Book Fair in Paris
Thousands of Books — starting at 50 centimes
Signed first editions, paperbacks, rare books, children’s books, DVDs, CDs, including books from the libraries of Diane Johnson, Mavis Gallant, C.K. Williams, E.L. Doctrow, Carolyn Kizer, Robert Harris and many more. Not to be missed!

Saturday, October 16th from 2:00 p.m. to 9 p.m. (auction at 6:00)
Sunday, October 17th from 11:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.

WICE
20 bd du Montparnasse
75015 Paris
Métro Duroc

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THE WALLACE FOUNTAINS

There are 108 Wallace Fountains with potable water all around Paris streets, square and gardens.

In 1872, Sir Richard Wallace, donated 50 drinking fountains to be established at the most useful points for public refreshment. Installation started in 1875; the first fountain was placed on boulevard de la Villette. The city quickly installed an additional 30 and today there are 108.

For a complete list of locations, visit
http://www.paris.fr/fr/environnement/eau/fontaines_wallace/default.asp

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Classified Ads
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VACATION APARTMENT

Two-Bedroom Apartment Available September 4 – 14, 2004
Located in a 17th century Le Marais Hotel Particulier, this 70 square meter apartment two-bedroom apartment with lots of light is nicely furnished and is perfect for a single woman in the freshly renovated guest room when owner Adrian Leeds is in or for up to 4 people when she’s traveling.

Pictures and more details available here: /parlerparis/apartments/rentals/leeds.html

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VACATION APARTMENT

For rent by the week or longer

Two lovely 2 or 3-bedroom apartments — 1st arrondissement, same building. Just minutes away: the Louvre, Tuilleries, Place Vendome and more. French style gives you a true taste of Paris. Fully equiped makes your Paris stay effortless, comfortable and memorable.
Complete information at http://www.youlloveparis.com

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VACATION APARTMENT

Livingstone Luxury Penthouse Condo
Bedrooms: 1
Bathrooms: 1
Sleeps: 2 to 4

Beautiful completely renovated apartment is located on the 7th and top floor (with elevator) of a typical 1930’s Parisian building on rue Livingstone in Montmartre. From inside the apartment there is a spectacular view of sky, Parisian rooftops and all of Sacre Coeur. Montmartre is known as one of the most romantic spots in Paris, and the lovely view from this penthouse apartment will certainly help to confirm this. Email Erica Berman for more information.

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VACATION APARTMENT

Luxury 3 bedroom 107m2 Apartment
rue de Grenelle with Eiffel tower view
Bedrooms: 3
Bathrooms: 1
Sleeps: up to 6 guests

This beautiful quiet newly renovated 107m2 (about 1070 square feet) luxurious three bedroom left bank Paris apartment on the 4th floor (with elevator) is situated in the heart of the chic 7th arrondissement in Paris. Email Erica Berman for more information.

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Rue Mazagran Penthouse Apartment with Two Balconies

Bedrooms: 1
Bathrooms: 1
Sleeps: 2-3 guests

The rue Mazagran Penthouse newly renovated one bedroom apartment is a haven of tranquility located very close to the center of Paris.

Email Erica Berman for more information.

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VACATION APARTMENT

Rent a luxury apartment in Paris and in other parts of France your next stay and have all the conveniences of home. Visit /parlerparis/apartments for a listing of
International Living’s favorite great stays.

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French Property Insider is an e-mail newsletter from the editors of Parler Paris. If you’d like to learn about the insights, recommendations, and discoveries about buying and investing in real estate in Paris and France that French Property Insider readers get every week, read more about a subscription here:
http://www.agora-inc.com/reports/FPI/WFPID8PF/ or call 1-800-643-2479.