Conversations and Conductions

When you’re sitting around a dinner table with a group of friends, the conversation mostly depends on where that dinner is taking place. It’s an observation I made years ago and it continues to fascinate me.

When you’re living in France, your French friends will discuss a broad range of topics that mostly focus on cultural or political issues, but it’s rare that they will ask personal questions. You could easily spend hours with a group of people and never learn their last names, what they do for a living, where they are from, or if they have kids. Instead, you might learn what their favorite cheese is and the best place to buy it, what exhibitions are on that you shouldn’t miss, or great places to visit on vacation. They might even spend the evening discussing wild mushrooms. They have no problems talking politics and no one gets upset if they disagree. In fact, they’re hoping for that kind of banter as it then becomes a whole lot more interesting and challenging. I suppose that to get personal is simply considered rude and invasive. From my observations, it’s just not done.

Americans have a very different view point, because one of the first things we do is want to get to know the person by asking where they come from, what do they do for a living, if they have children, etc., etc. We want to show that we are interested in that person. The French joke that we Americans might as well be asking how much someone earns, just by virtue of asking what they do for a living since it can give a lot of clues about their financial wealth. Just like we don’t understand why they don’t ask personal questions, they don’t understand why we do.

But that’s a general observation. On a more specific level, I’ve observed that people from different American cities discuss very different things. And that is likely true in France, since different places tend to attract different types of people and therefore the conversations are likely to be different, as well. For example, I’d venture to say that Parisians will talk a lot more about cultural things than those living on the Riviera who might discuss weather patterns or the color of the sea as it changes or where to buy the freshest fish. Those living in Bordeaux might spend a lot more time talking about wine, while those living in Normandy might talk about their favorite dishes using “crème fraiche” or which farm produces the best “Camembert.” I’m just speculating here, as I can’t say I’ve been privy to these dinner parties, however, I’ve lived in a lot of cities in the U.S. and traveled to many, having experienced the phenomena there and this is where I’ve formulated these ideas.

When you’re in Los Angeles, for example, the conversation around the table tends to include diet and exercise and/or the latest health craze, the price of real estate, the best sushi on the West Side or the price of gasoline. How long it takes to get from one point to another is always on the table. The latest movies could easily enter the picture since there’s always at least one person at the table who works in “The Industry,” meaning the film and/or TV industry. One thing for sure, the conversation will be light, fun, and never serious…why spoil a good party with politics? Someone will almost always say, “Let’s not go there.”

In New Orleans, the conversation at the table is almost always about the last great meal you had in a local restaurant or the next great meal you’re about to have. They are always talking about food. That could take hours, just debating over which Oyster Po’Boy is the best in town! And if it’s not about food, then it’s about next week’s parade or festival, since there is always one coming up. The conversation is always jovial and fun since life in New Orleans is all about partying and having a good time.

In Knoxville, Tennessee, where I lived for 14 years, the conversation at the table almost always focused on gossip about everyone else. It was by far the most interesting topic since there wasn’t too much going on in town except for the shenanigans of the townsfolk. It was always lively, funny and relatively harmless. Not to disparage Knoxville, as it’s a beautiful city and it provided a real foundation for my life, but after all those years, I could count all my friends on one hand, all of whom had come from other places, since there simply weren’t too many people with whom I could relate. I was a fish out of water there and didn’t realize it until we started traveling, particularly to Europe. We then moved to Los Angeles, a city I believed was the most progressive place on the face of the planet, and I still believe this to be true.

In Maui, the conversation around the table is not like anywhere else on the planet. Mauians have perfected spiritual and personal care to an art form. Almost everyone on the island, or at least everyone with whom I have met, believes in living a totally natural life, without chemicals or toxicity, and promoting a serious communication with one’s inner self. They have invented self-help and self-care procedures you have never heard of, offered up by practitioners that fall into the category of “healers.” I haven’t understood a single word they say, as they are on a different plane than anywhere else I’ve experienced.

In Maui, other than the conventional medical practitioners and specialists, there is a broad range of alternative and complementary practitioners—acupuncturists, naturopathic physicians, chiropractors, massage therapists and bodyworkers, aromatherapists and herbalists, homeopaths, and energy medicine practitioners (reiki, qi gong, and other energy-based healing modalities).

My daughter and all of her friends are neck deep into this new-age thinking about health. She is forever trying to bring me into their realm. She equated my dinosaur behavior to how most people of her generation are using an iPhone 16 Pro Max, while I’m still making calls from a flip phone (not really). She has a point.

Every time I come to Maui, she makes appointments for me with one or more of these practitioners, hoping it will help me live to very ripe old age and prove her point. The flip-phone dinosaur in me resists, but I go along to appease her and then don’t really get as much out of it as she would like. It’s a game we play, but we play it nonetheless.

This time, she and her friends never stopped talking about Energy Therapy, aka energy healing or biofield therapy—”a form of alternative medicine that involves channeling healing energy into a person’s body to restore balance and well-being. It is based on the belief that the body has an energy field that can be manipulated to promote physical, emotional, and spiritual healing.” You can just see me now as I’m already rolling my eyes…much to her dismay.

But, I agreed to take a day to experience it for myself. She set me up at a gym she goes to regularly, FusionFit, that is equipped with “Pulsed Electromagnetic Field therapy” equipment. “PEMF” therapy is a “non-invasive treatment that uses low-frequency electromagnetic pulses to stimulate the body’s natural healing processes, potentially promoting tissue regeneration and pain relief by influencing cellular activity at the site of injury or inflammation; essentially, it aims to accelerate the body’s own repair mechanisms by delivering pulsed magnetic fields to the affected area.”

According to what I’ve read and was told, “PEMF pulses are believed to interact with the cells’ electrical potential, influencing cellular processes like blood flow, collagen production, and inflammation, thereby promoting tissue healing and pain reduction.” The point was to try to get my energy back after having been knocked on my tooshy from Flu A…so why not?

They instructed me to lie on a special mat and for 15 minutes, I could gently feel the impulses, but nothing significant happened that I could tell. Then they moved me to a kind of recliner chair and did something very similar, again for 15 minutes.

The third treatment at the gym involved standing almost naked in a vertical booth for 10 minutes for “Red Light Energy Therapy” or RLT. I wore goggles to protect my eyes and was surrounded by lights which produced near-infrared light, and quite a bit of heat. Again, this is “a non-invasive treatment that uses low-wavelength red or near-infrared light to promote healing, reduce inflammation, and improve skin health. It is also known as photobiomodulation (PBM) or low-level laser therapy (LLLT).”

Supposedly, the red light penetrates the skin at a depth of about 5-10 mm, stimulating the “mitochondria” (the powerhouse of cells) to produce more “adenosine triphosphate” (ATP), the energy currency of the cell. This boosts cellular repair and regeneration. The benefits are, according to the experts:

• Reduces wrinkles, fine lines, acne, and scars by boosting collagen production.
• Helps with arthritis, muscle recovery, and joint pain.
• Used in treating androgenic alopecia (hair loss).
• Speeds up recovery from cuts, burns, and injuries.
• Helps regulate melatonin production, improving sleep and reducing symptoms of depression.
• Reduces muscle soreness and accelerates healing after workouts.

The day of therapy didn’t stop there. Just a few steps from the gym was the Maui Scalar Room, an Energy Enhancement System. Scalar is not a word I’d ever heard before. Scalar energy therapy “uses scalar waves, also known as Tesla waves or longitudinal waves, to promote healing and balance in the body. Unlike traditional electromagnetic waves, scalar waves are believed to have a non-linear, multidimensional nature that can penetrate deep into cells, restoring their optimal function.”

I entered a low lit room outfit with about 12 large recliner chairs, picked up a blanket to cover myself and saw screens on each corner of the room that looked alien.

What it touts as therapeutic is that it’s supposed to:

• Balance the body’s energy field—enhancing overall health and well-being.
• Improve cellular function—boosting ATP production for better energy.
• Detoxify the body—supporting the removal of toxins and heavy metals.
• Reduce inflammation and pain—helping conditions like arthritis and muscle pain.
• Enhance mental clarity and emotional stability—promoting relaxation and reducing stress.

All I know is that I fell asleep in the chair for about 45 minutes and woke up with a stiff neck. I left feeling like a zombie. I just wanted to go home and get a neck massage. My daughter rolled her eyes in disbelief.

I suppose one has to believe in all this for it really to work and take affect. That’s what she says, at any rate. This is where my flip-phone thinking has trouble jumping the hurdle to the iPhone 16 Pro Max, although I’m not as far behind in my thinking as she thinks…I’m on an iPhone 13 Pro Max, which isn’t as far behind as she accuses me.

My time in Maui is coming to an end on Wednesday and that means saying “Aloha” to my daughter and grandson, but not for long. They will spend their summer in Paris with me. I’ve been preparing Little Leeds by teaching him a little French—he already recognizes that when I say “un, deux, trois,” on “trois” he will get picked up and cuddled. Of course, eventually he’ll be fluent in French and live a more international/global existence when he enters French “École Maternelle,” preschool for kids aged 3 to 6 years old. It’s part of the French public education system, is free and not mandatory, although most children attend. That’s why as adults, they can have such intellectual conversations around the table!

I look forward to having everyone home in Paris.

A la prochaine…